general solution : re: confusion arising from animals and their tendency to "disagree" or "argue" w/ violence or opposing genetalia (male v. female coexistence, the presence of two options, troubling, arousing sexually), the gender an example, an argument based on itself and the following:
example: a year when i found the "dog " dad brought home the "dog", which was hungry, which i fed, which asked for more food (in nonhuman methods, obvious) but dog, pissed on new rug, frequently, was not used to dogs, phoned "police authorities", lectured, "do not phone police when dog urinates instead attempt to "salvage" and "repair",,,forgot point to dog example, forgot original concept, forgot original objective, remembered, example was not relevant, a new "example" is a better idea
example:a year when i found change on floor, realized money readily available in "the home", placed hammer forcibly onto lemonade stand (no longer needed) and swam under couch for more and found more, and "11 gumballs" the total of the change when put into use. goal: chew "11 gumballs" in succession. placed on kitchen table, 10 gumballs, to avoid oversaturation of mouth re: chewing. 10 gumballs missing: : : "father"? (probably) reminded father forcibly w/ mouth, w/ volume, of his crime. father "didn't fucking care", "i saw you grabbing that change off the floor, that was mine anyway", "im not having you chew all that at once", "no, i hid it and you can have a piece after dinner", "your mother isn't going to tell you", "honey god damnit", (near-perfect accuracy recall, certain)
theory: so the gumballs, gender, dog, 3 examples of 3 "states" or alternatives, as illustrated-
fairly certain in theory
proof of theory, of concept, of belief:
provided self with no other concept than "feeling" or "internal guide", ,,,,,,,,,, other "truths" or "decisions" carried weight of personal effect from other "state" or "alternative", all "states" differ in approach.
"MAN"/"PLANT"/"ANIMAL" in fierce competition on major opinions, ex: "is the dairy queen dilly bar important"
1. MAN: the dairy queen dilly bar is source of "job satisfaction" "salary" by ext: "purpose"/dilly bar tastes, delicious, several flavors=message of "hope for change or ability to make own choices/direct own path through existence" MANS VALUE OF DAIRY QUEEN "DILLY BAR"- 100
2. ANIMAL: the dairy queen "dilly bar" makes the animal vomit, unwell, confused. animal prefers to "eat own shit" than diary queen "dq dilly bar butterscotch, cool off with your family (animals aren't family,)" ANIMALS VALUE OF DIARY QUEEN "DILLY BAR" - none
3. PLANT: plant isn't alive, incapable of thought---> opinion on dilly bar or anything else. plant isn't even important, no respect to be given to plant which takes up space, plant takes up also some of language's best "names", which could be used on the important "ANIMAL" or "MAN". plant may as well "GET IT OVER WITH" PLANTS VALUE OF DAIRY QUEEN "DILLY BAR" -inconsequential
theory: 3 states differing approaches not the end, within each group further divisive levels of value upon dairy queen "dilly bar". THEREFORE: no single one can be true, no single approach is to be trusted. this is applied onto all things,,,,,,,the only possible approach, therefore,,,, personal "instinct"
personal "instinct" can not lead to a "opinion" or "direction" which is the preferable way to spend ones time while existing, one can not form "opinion" or "decision" or one is doing "something wrong"
living life best as i can by this "standard", refusal to "contemplate" theory or "franchise frozen desserts" ----> a "full understanding" in un-languageable "feeling"
ready now to continue.